As Supreme Court Justice William Brandies noted so eloquently in a 1930 opinion, “[t]he word ‘return’ is not a technical word of art.”[1] Translated from circumlocution and niceties to frank and righteous indignation, this means that Congress (via the IRS), which exerts so much time, energy, resources, and three to four shared administrative brain cells to the task of assigning and perfecting the definitions of definitions, beating a dead horse until even the glue factory